May 21st, 2010
Been thinking
The last few weeks have been really hard, and I haven’t been able to sleep much lately. I go to bed at 2 am just to wake back at at 4 and I don’t fall back asleep until almost 6. Part of it due to stress, the other part is due to the lack of knowing what will happen day to day. I have been trying like crazy to find a new job so I can save up to see Girl this Christmas like we want to, but I am running out of time and have been forced to apply to something I didn’t want to do. It’s all in an attempt to make as much as I can to see her as quick as possible….
Night after night, for weeks now, I say good night to her and go to bed only to wake back up a little bit latter. Thinking too much about what might happen if I don’t find some work soon.. Just when i think I’ve lost it, I look at a gift from her. An early birthday present and think to myself her saying “Everything will be OK, we will make the best of this”. With that thought I snap out of the rut I am in and start thinking better thoughts. She is my compass through this ordeal, keeping me on the right path.
Its now 5 am. I am off to bed trying to get to some sleep. Man, I wish she was here with me. I don’t think i would have such an issue sleeping if my bed wasn’t so empty.
Boy.
(Source: 5242miles.com)
January 5th, 2010
Trying to get back to normal
I don’t know what to say, I don’t know what to do. It’s been a little bit of time since I have been back home after my Trip to see her. But I am having the hardest time getting back into the swing of things here.
I miss the nice weather. I miss the wonderfull food. I miss the laid back lifestyle. But most of all I miss her. I miss being right there with her, I miss being able to reach over and give her a kiss, I miss being able to feel her stuck to my side…. I guess untill we live together some day that I will always feels like this after leaving her.
It almost feels like something is missing from my day-to-day life without her hugs and kisses.
It is all magnified by the fact that her internet connection has been dead for a while now. I call her cellphone with Skype, but that just isn’t the same as hearing her whisper in my ear “I love you” on a crowded bus, or to stand so that no one gets too close to her on a packed train.
I MISS YOU LOVE!
On the way to the Terminal in the airport was the hardest thing I ever did. Seeing her on the verge of tears… I wanted to run back and give a huge hug and never let go. But the last thing I needed to do was miss the flight and get detained for braking airport securty rules.
I love you, baby. I will be back to see you, you can count on it.
Boy
(Source: 5242miles.com)
